Dog Stars

My relationship with my new dog (Lolly) is different than my relationship with my last dog (Boo Radley.) Lolly and I sat on the porch last night discussing this (I did most of the talking, she just listened intently, head cocked, scouring the language for phonics resembling "walk" and "treat") and pondering reasons: Is it a gender difference? (Lolly is female, Boo was a male.) Perhaps an ages-old breed distinction? (Lolly is Shepherd/Lab, Boo was Chow/Golden Retriever) Or is it simply that Lolly is an Aries and I'm a Libra?

I actually don't know if she's an Aries, since her adoption paperwork didn't include a birthday. But when you look up the traits for Aries, it sure sounds like Lolly: "assertive, energetic, intelligent, individualistic, independent, impulsive, full of strength, competitive, eager, headstrong, focused on the present and freedom-loving." (Anyone who has walked Lolly will attest to the accuracy of eager, headstrong, and freedom-loving, and likely has grass-stained knees as evidence.)

I'm no expert on Astrology (a comic understatement on a par with George W Bush saying, "I'm no expert at grammar") but I can't help but wonder if dogs are subject to the same astrologically-assumed behavior patterns of their so-called masters: Astrology has to do with the alignment of the planets and the arrangement of the stars (I imagine an astrologer would respond with exasperation, "The 'arrangement of the stars' never changes, dipshit") so why would it be any different for animals than it is for humans? Most dog owners will confirm that dogs are most certainly affected by full moons, so it stands to reason that they would also be influenced by Venus passing through Saturn's house. (Yes, exasperated astrologer, I know that was likely a Bushian mangle of terminology.) I've known Taurus dogs ("dependable, responsible, loyal, patient, placid, stable, affectionate, sometimes stubborn"), I've known Pisces dogs ("compassionate, empathetic, sensitive, easy-going, undiscriminating, sometimes distracted and lazy") and there has always been more to each of them than mere breed differences.

Frankly, I have always thought that breed differences in dogs are like skin color on humans: It makes a big difference if you want it to make a difference, but it's quite immaterial if you don't, and the only thing preventing a Poodle and a Basset Hound from being friends is the attitude of the dogs themselves, some predisposition against humorously bulbous tails or comically floppy ears.

I'm even more certain of that now: If the Poodle and the Basset opt to tussle, it's not a commentary on the proclivity for belligerence of either breed; it's more likely that the Poodle is a Leo and the Basset is a Scorpio. That's mixing fire and water, friends---of course they're not going to get along.